interesting new product I ran across

Wed 1 Apr 87 00:10:51-EST

This crossed my desk today and I thought some people out there might have
some interest in it. I don't mean to advertise on the net, I mean, after all,
*I* certainly have no connection with "FTAM Hardware, Inc.".
                                        - john romkey
                                        FTP Software, Inc.

FTAM Hardware, Inc Product Announcement PA0000

        The Illudium Q-2 Explosive Network Demodulator

The Illudium Q-2 Explosive Network Demodulator is a must for all network
installations. It eliminates dangerous modulations from your network.
It features a 100Hz low pass filter; now all your hosts will show the
same performance on network operations!

Standard features include Ethernet, IEEE, ARPANET, SATNET, ProNET-10
and synchronous and asynchronous serial line compatability. TCP/IP,
DECnet, XNS, Chaosnet, SNA and ISO modes available. NETBIOS interface
standard, and the Network Demodulator will attempt to negotiate into
3270 emulation mode when possible. Supports Berkeley Unix protocols.
Converts trailers into Recreational Vehicles.

Microwave, infrared and fiberoptic options are available, though the
standard kit works with phone lines.

The Illudium Q-2 Explosive Network Demodulator includes a network
monitoring feature, with, as a standard feature, a command that will
monitor the network to tell you your choice of Jon Postel's, Vint
Cerf's, Dave Mills' or Richard M. Stallman's password (special
hardware support provided for the latter). Also has facilities for
seeing who IBM, DEC and AT&T are sending packets to, now that they're
all connected to the same network.

Tempest certified. One size fits all. Fully compliant with the ULANA
and GOSIP specifications. Implements full source-routing and security
features. Available in green, red, blue and plaid cases.

Requires GNU Emacs Version 78.90 or later, and 200Mb physical memory
(188 for Emacs, 12 for the Illudium Q-2 Explosive Network Demodulator).

(The Illudium Q-2 Explosive Network Demodulator is also useful for for
handling obstacles which obstruct your satellite link to Venus.)

Order by midnight tonight and receive these free gifts:

The Ginzu ethernet splicer!

The TJ Watson memorial EBCDIC decoder ring!


the Vint Cerf Programmable Calculator which takes as input a data
storage medium and a mode of transportation and calculates your bit

("where's the kaboom? there's supposed to be a network-shattering kaboom!")

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